All parents want something for their children. I’m no different than a parent who wants their daughter or son to be a doctor or a nurse. The difference here is I’m old school and I believe that what you influence your daughters to be will determine the fate of a nation. There are other things I selfishly want her to be- like a basketball player or a track and field star because she has those genetics, but those career paths don’t easily lead to love, marriage or prospering families. I wouldn’t want her to be an athletic gladiator just for the entertainment purposes of others, though, so I shelf the fact that she can probably outrun any boy her age. But real talk… I’ve looked at my life, my upbringing, my relationship with my parents; their relationships with their parents, my past and present relationships with women to see who or what influence would be most suitable for her long term happiness. I’ve also done the same analysis on her mother. I’ve done the simple math of who we are and where we come from and I believe that influencing her to be a wife and an anchor for continuing or establishing a family legacy. Instilling that early would elevate her above what both her mother and I have experienced from our upbringing in the realm of love and marriage.
One of the things that plague people my age and older (I’m early 30’s) is that marriage has been commercially high jacked from us. It’s been purposely ruined so certain classes of people don’t get the opportunity to marry and nurture a unified family. We’ve replaced the aspirations for love, marriage and a sprawling family with careers or punk ass jobs. We’re influencing our daughters to be workers instead of nurturers. It’s a damn shame how many people don’t understand how important it is for a woman to marry and assume this role of wife and head nurturer of the family. Grown ass men still need to be nurtured by their mothers and you’ve got millions of children who only get nurtured by their mothers for three hours per day because she’s off at some punk ass job trying to afford to keep up with not having a firm family backing in the first place. People act like it’s all about the missing father. That right there is just as big of a joke because any woman working 30+ hours per week is also a missing parent to their child. This mother is insecure because no one ever gave her security and as she continues to struggle or work hard just to make ends meet, even if she wants more for her daughter– this is what she’s giving to her. This culture says its OK for women to have a baby and within three months dump the baby at a daycare to go worship her true god- work. Apparently what we influence our daughters to become is more important than the children they’ll have. Good job America!
Why is a wife important?
Wealth, culture and legacy can be transferred to the newer generations if two people (or more if you’re polygamous) can come together to create and provide for their family.
In every scenario where a family grows to become unified and prosperous, the wife’s role is critical to the overall success of this trans-generational process. A wife’s role is critical to the husband’s self-esteem and his legacy. When a man gives his entirety to his purpose in life, the woman he marries receives the energy of love and fulfillment rather than confusion and disillusionment. Wives are for husbands. Mothers are for children. Today’s women are more prepared to be mothers, but are largely ill equipped to be wives because the art form of being a wife is disappearing. The wife is a portal for a man’s dreams; she’s a conduit for transferring his life force into new beings. She’s the direct beneficiary of his love. She’s honored and her praises are sung because she protects his vision and multiplies his love for her into the children they have and the community they dwell in, at large. She’s his reminder that it is better to make love than to make war.
The wife role comes before motherhood and that’s what a lot of us of the last 50 years don’t quite get because so many of our mothers became mothers without becoming wives. Or worse, they married underdeveloped pseudo men who were abusive and self-destructive- I can’t blame any woman for running from that. All this social conditioning has gotten women afraid to become wives because they fear being oppressed by a man. They fear it so much that many never learn how to trust a man. They end up playing the field and shortchanging themselves and the children they have from these scenarios. This is where it gets easy to blame men, but they shouldn’t blame men when it’s the culture.
The way our relationships are set up today spells disaster for marriage and families. Look at how bad sh*t is now and look at history. It wasn’t always like this. The way we operate now as man and woman in modern societies is genocidal because our roles have been flipped upside down and neutralized. Regular people can end this viscous cycle with strong marriages. Strong marriages with wives who instill in their children the value of marriage, family and respecting the role everyone must play in life. Men lead by actionable examples and they also lead by being the chief giver of love to their wives, but the best person to instill these values in a child’s upbringing is the wife- she who is loyal to the role she plays for her husband, her children and her community. It’s even more an honor when an esteemed wife gets to pass down the legacy of wifehood unto her daughter. It’s so sad that today’s culture has made the housewife seem like her role is useless and extinct. But if we had more marriages, our daughters would easily see the value in being a wife. More loving marriages will make it crystal clear to our daughters that her value as a wife and (then) mother by far superceeds her value as job worker.
What I want for her
I’d like for a man to have the desire to love and protect my daughter. I’d like him and I to have so much in common that we can work together as a family and increase our fortunes in whatever capacity that our union provides. I’d like for her to marry a man who has a strong preexisting concept family, marriage and love. I’d like for her to have all the feminine grace and teachings that will help her attract a man who is first dedicated to his purpose in life. I don’t want him to put her first, I want him to put his people first. I want him to be someone who when he marries my daughter, is free enough to be a father to the children. I don’t want him to be chasing money or possessions. I want him to be fulfilled with the knowledge of himself so that he can fully give himself to his divine calling in life.
Raising my daughter to desire to be a wife wouldn’t mean she’s denied of any opportunities in life. You’re narrow minded if you think that it does. She’s free to be as she pleases until she’s ready to be a mother and a wife where she will then dedicate herself to her family. Ain’t nothing wrong with that. This is just what I want for (and whats best for her)- she could decide otherwise if she chooses to. I know that my marriage would have to be exemplary and timely enough to show her the value of marriage. Some people get high off the fact that they raised their sons and daughters to be unhappy 9-5 workers. That life didn’t work for me so what I look like trying to lead my children down that path. That ain’t no badge of honor. It’s productive in today’s society, but it’s another one of the lies we live that we really don’t have to live.
Men with daughters need to be vigilant about this. Your family will prosper if your daughter is partnered to a strong and beneficial man who brings a family legacy of his own to the table. When a woman is healthy and open to love, being paired with a healthy man whom she is physically attracted to and bonded to in marriage creates bliss in her life. She then passes her high regards of her husband on to their children. Their children will grow to honor their father and mother. If her husband can truly be her hero, then she can bring forth legacies of children who add to the numbers of those who are dedicated to the way of life her and her husband are dedicated to. That’s what men are here to do, but are not doing.
It’s riskier for a woman not to marry
Today women are more stressed out and are suffering from a host of illnesses since they are more inclined to life of hard work with no love, no protection and no father for their children. All forms of cancers are up among these hard working women and fatalities from them are rising. Breast cancer plagues our women and people rarely correlate these kind of lifestyle diseases to the massive role change women have had to endure. Sickness is stressful enough then add having children unmarried with no man who gives her the love she needs- that leads to depression. This is real life and our communities are a breeding ground for men and women who will have sex with each other recklessly and have children who will most likely be clutched by their mothers.
Almost every woman I know from their early 20’s to 40’s carry with them some straight up horror stories about being single and having multiple partners in their lives. They were taught to go to school, get an education, get a job, but not necessarily to get married and be a good man’s wife. Society told them that they shouldn’t marry so soon and that they should sample as many penises as they can before they settle down. But the more sampled penises, the more confusion and chaos for the majority of them. Ironically, most of these women I speak of did exceptionally well in going to school, getting an education and a job, but were dragged through the mud in countless relationships and many are brokenhearted from these experiences.
Why would I want my daughter to even take the risk on going that path when so many are susceptible to failure? In some aspects the bad example has already been set because her mother and I never married, but the light I didn’t see early on, I see now and while I’m open to her being anything she wants to be, I’d prefer for her to be a woman who is loved and protected by her husband and nurtures her family and her children. This is needed and if families are ever to sustain themselves again, the wife is a critical role that must be honored. Today this needs to be taught once again. All this talk about divine femininity and goddess-ship rarely advocates marriage and the significance of the role of the wife. Do your research. Men have always their wives. Those who didn’t never became men; they just grew up to look like men. Every man must be to his wife what he wants a man to be to his daughter. The most honorable position a woman can hold in a man’s life is as his wife.
What do you think? What do you want for your daughter?